Medium. We need to talk. 💔
In the Beginning
When our relationship started, it was a breath of fresh air. I must admit, the first thing that attracted me was your looks. You had no ads. No clutter. You were neat and organized, and looking at a Medium article was a joyful experience.
But things are different now. I know it’s natural to let yourself go a bit over time, but you have to admit that you’ve went off the rails.
And it isn’t just the looks. It might have been the initial attraction, sure, but I’m not that shallow.
OK, you always had your flaws; you couldn’t do everything people might want you to, but you were good at what you did do. You seemed so unapologetically confident in your offering, and in your own skin. I didn’t want to think of you as a controlling partner, per se, but let’s just agree that you like things how you like them. And if you think a post looks best one way, there was never room for argument; we’d lay the post out your way.
You didn’t need me. But from the moment I saw you, I needed you.
I dropped my ex-blog without any more thought; I didn’t even text goodbye 👋
It’s foolish to go into a relationship with expectations that changes will come and make me happier. I know that. I took you as you were, and I liked it. I thought to myself:
You know what? This, this is a blogging platform I could grow old with 👴📝
I didn’t want you to change. But you did. Maybe I was naive in thinking I could keep you as you were. In my heart, I knew you’d probably a change a little, but I didn’t realise what you’d eventually become.
Can we talk about the neediness? You used to just be content when we were together. But now you’re getting quite selective in what you’re letting me see. Now you want me to register. You want me to log in.
You want to control what I’m reading and scold me when it’s not what you want me to read.
It’s getting a bit creepy to be honest.
And that other thing you do - I don’t like it. You know the thing. The thing where you start telling me a story and then tell me you’ve already told me 3 stories this month, and you want paid to continue the story.
I think this is when it all started going downhill. I used to enjoy looking around and seeing posts. I would see a shared Medium link and happily click it, knowing I was about to have a nice time; the content usually great and always easy on the eye.
And then, like it always does, money reared its ugly green head. At first, it was subtle. I’d sometimes stumble upon a premium article and that was OK. I think this period lasted a while.
But something changed. Again. Suddenly the premium articles were everywhere. I couldn’t look at Medium without a sea of little ⭐ indicating the article was behind your paywall. I felt a bit betrayed.
I felt like you were always so open and honest with me and now here you are keeping secrets; keeping things from me and sharing them with others.
What started as a niggle became a real annoyance.
At first I wondered where the sea of paywalled articles were coming from. You couldn’t have magically convinced everyone to sign up overnight I thought. And then I realised what you’d been up to. You dirty little dog, you’ve been up to no good, haven’t you?
You’ve been putting articles behind your paywall without the authors even realising it, haven’t you?
Obviously, doing it subtly. Subtle enough that the authors weren’t really sure what happened or why their readers were locked out. Maybe it was their own fault, I heard a few suggest. Maybe they clicked the wrong button somewhere.
But no, that’s not the case at all. It was you. Too many times articles appeared behind the paywall to the surprise of authors.
So there’s the neediness, the control issues, the begging, nagging and gaslighting. It’s all got a bit much. I feel like a deliberate and sustained effort to wear me down and get money from me isn’t a healthy foundation for our relationship.
You created paradise, then started deliberately ruining it, all the while telling me I could make it stop. You were the poison and the cure.
Leaving on good terms
But let’s not leave each other on bad terms. We had some good times together, right? Sure you let yourself go and you got a bit less easy on the eyes. And you got a bit needy. And at times, a bit creepy. And I didn’t enjoy when you sabotaged our relationship and then asked for cash to fix it again. That’s pretty abusive. The dishonesty wasn’t good.
Maybe I’d have felt more comfortable paying for Medium if it felt more like I was getting something in return and less like I was being extorted.
But the writing was probably always on the wall, and this shouldn’t really have surprised either of us. Being a publishing platform is a tough business, and you were always going to want things from me that I didn’t want to give you, and vice versa.
I was told by many people that I was foolish to be posting my content on Medium. You have to own your own content they would say. I didn’t want to hear it at the time. There are some things you can’t learn by hearing and have to learn by hurting.
And to be honest, if I’m digging real deep down in the feelings sac, I’m not even mad at you; I’m mad at me. Mad at myself for thinking this could have ended differently.
I’ve Met Someone Else
I know, I know, I should take a beat to have time to myself. I shouldn’t go rushing from one blogging platform to another. But I guess I’m a serial mono-blogamist.
I’ve met someone else and his name is Hugo. Maybe it’s time for me to be in control of the relationship for a change.